Advice is everywhere. There is never a shortage of it.
Maybe you’ve sometimes felt the same thing I have: there is too much advice flying around. Sometimes it’s just drifting by. Sometimes it is bombarding us.
Advice on what to do.. what not to do..
Or: what to THINK .. what NOT to think.. that’s trickier.
And the absolute worst kind of advice – for me – what to feel.. or NOT to feel.
So I try to remember that when I give advice. And I try not to give advice, unless it is asked for. But I do enjoy it, trying to help.
When I do give solicited advice, I try to never start sentences with “You Must.” I rarely start a sentence with “You Should.” Sometimes I slip on that.
There are other, better ways to present advice. I know sometimes it seems like ONLY the direct, forceful approach would work. But how many useful messages don’t get through, simply because of the way they are delivered?
The advice we get that really makes a difference – a lasting difference – is advice that MAKES SENSE TO US… a message that connects with some level of our consciousness or awakens some idea that’s already within us.
Hopefully, you have people in your life that love you and care about you. They might be older and wiser. They might be filled with the best intentions.
But that doesn’t mean their advice is best for you. All of us are shaped by experience, so the advice we get is quite often colored by the pain or disappointments of others.
How do I sort out excellent advice from well meaning but off base suggestions? By remembering that most of the answers that we need are inside our minds already. It’s just that sometimes they are buried, or obscured by the external static that invades our brains.
The ability to tune out that static and let our inner voice come through is an acquired skill. At least it was for me.
Distraction free solitude is the best starting point. It could be meditating, just sitting quietly, walking, swimming, whatever helps create a calm, focused mentally state. I’ve found that being in nature helps me think more clearly. Putting aside the devices that dominate so much of our attentions is crucial.
Do this often enough, and your self awareness will improve to the point where you’ll easily detect the static that you need to silence.
Search for the quiet. Experiment. Find what works best for you. It’s an inward journey worth taking.
You might find all the advice that you need is already within you.